


Adolescence

by Basingstoke



Series: Unfinished WIP clearinghouse [17]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Abortion, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, F/F, F/M, Family, M/M, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Other, Puberty, Street Harassment
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-01
Updated: 2019-02-01
Packaged: 2019-10-20 13:12:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,254
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17623016
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Basingstoke/pseuds/Basingstoke
Summary: The passage from childhood into adulthood is long, fraught, and trying for everyone involved.





	Adolescence

**Author's Note:**

> Mind the tags.

"Your sister raped my brother," Laura says into the phone. 

She pauses. Derek presses his face into the couch back and waits to see what would happen. 

"Because I just had to take him to get an abortion. We saved the evidence. It's being DNA tested now." Pause. "No, he hasn't presented, which you would know if you were in the same room with him. Omegas menstruate for years before their first heat." Pause. "Over my dead body. Not until she's in jail. What do you think the probability is that she happens to rape my brother right before my family's house burns down?" 

It hurts to think. He focuses on the ache in his guts. 

He was fifteen and pregnant. That was even too young for MTV. 

And his parents are dead. 

And his sister. 

And his cousins. 

And his aunts. 

And his grandparents. 

"This is a human crime. My baby sister was human. And she was _nine_. I thought you had a code?" 

Kate didn't think human laws meant much. She asked if he wanted her and he did. She made him yearn and push into her hands, so that meant something, right? It didn't matter that his cloaca was bone dry when she fucked him. That was normal between (before) heats, and still meant he wanted her, right? 

He doesn't want to read the pamphlets Planned Parenthood gave him. He doesn't want to find out how many lies she told him. 

"Then it's war," Laura says. "There are no alternatives." 

Derek rolls onto his back and stares at the ceiling. 

"Good," Laura says. She puts the phone down. "They're going to help turn her in to police," she tells Derek. 

Derek should probably be happy. 

*

He's nineteen when he finally presents. His gynecologist blames it on his low body fat and tells him not to work out so much. He's in no hurry, though. He doesn't want to want people. He's okay with being a child.

Laura has a mate, a tall beta male who works out with Derek, and has added another pack sub, a beta female. When Derek starts his heat, Laura nudges him in the ribs and nods meaningfully at Keira. Derek rolls his eyes and lurks in his room instead. 

Laura's mate Orlando knocks on his door a while later. "She wants you to be happy," he says. 

"She wants me to be normal," Derek says. 

Orlando sighs and sits on his bed. He pats Derek's calf. "Get you anything? You have a vibrator?" 

Derek snorts. He pulls the blanket over his head. 

"That's a no, then. I'll go to the store. It's nothing to be ashamed of, o-bro."

 

"Go away," Derek groans, but he's secretly glad when Orlando does bring him back a vibrator. 

He dreams of Kate fucking him, knotting him, making him come. He's furious when he wakes up. 

*

"We're moving back to Beacon Hills. Derek is grown up, so it's time to take back the family home," Laura says. 

They rent a house while Laura arranges for the demolition of the former house. They tell everyone Keira is a distant cousin. 

Uncle Peter is the same. His burns lost some color and rigidity, but there's nobody home behind his eyes. 

It takes a while to settle in. Laura makes a lateral move to assistant manager of the local Macy's, but Orlando is still trying to finish his communications degree and has to deal with distance learning, and Keira quickly learns they don't have professional dog walkers in Beacon Hills. She manages to get a job with Dr. Deaton, the vet, instead. He's just as magically mysterious as ever. Derek hates him for not warning any of them about Kate. 

Derek, meanwhile, gets a job babysitting the sheriff's kid, who lives down the street. 

"I'm thirteen!" Stiles wails. "I can babysit! I don't need to be babysat!" 

"Mm-hm," the Sheriff says. He raps the cast on Stiles's arm. 

"That was a total fluke! It could have happened to anyone!" 

"Anyone trying to skateboard off the garage roof, sure. Derek's your sitter. He's sitting on you until further notice. Get used to it." The Sheriff puts his hat on and the conversation is done. 

Derek admires him. For a beta, he does a good impression of an alpha. 

Stiles flings himself into the couch and sulks as his father leaves. "Why do you dress like that? Are you emo?" he asks. 

"No," Derek says. He's wearing black jeans, black sneakers, a gray shirt, and a black overshirt. Normal. 

"Do you have an alpha?" 

"No." 

"What's heat like?" 

"You're a kid!" 

"Yeah, that's why I don't know!" Stiles says. 

"I'm not telling you!" 

Stiles kicks his feet. "Why don't you have an alpha? I have an alpha."

"You do not," Derek says, but his stomach turns anyway. 

"I do! Her name is Lydia and she has strawberry blond hair." 

"Okay," Derek says. His stomach twists further. "Are you in class with her?" 

"Yeah. She's so smart. She can do calculus and they don't even teach that until senior year." 

"Cool," Derek says. His stomach relaxes (she's the same age, she's not preying on him) and he just feels sick. "Do you want something to drink?" 

"Yes. I want milk because it has calcium and protein." 

"Okay." Derek gets himself a ginger ale. He presses the can to his forehead for a minute. 

He'd like to be over Kate already. 

They spend the rest of the night playing video games. Derek wins, but only because Stiles is playing one-handed. 

*

"College, college, college," Laura says, poking him with a stack of brochures. "I let you slack while you were still unpresented. You're a grown-ass man now." 

"How are we going to pay for it?" 

"Mom had a college fund for us. I'm not going to use it, so you are. Just pick one." 

"Fine," Derek says. He takes the brochures over to babysit Stiles. 

It's a short day; he's only watching the kid for two hours until the Sheriff comes home, so the Sheriff finds him sitting at the dining room table staring at brochures. Stiles is sitting beside him struggling through Romeo and Juliet. 

"Moving on?" the Sheriff asks. 

Stiles throws his book. "Dad, this play is gross! Romeo is fourteen and Juliet is thirteen! They haven't even presented yet!" 

The Sheriff glances at Derek and Derek knows then that he knows about the abortion. Of course he does. The fire was the biggest thing to happen in Beacon Hills in a century; of course he would follow up on the trial and everything. Kate was put away for life for the murder and another six for statutory rape. Derek looks down at the table. 

He was a year and a half older than Stiles is now. He had the baby smell that Stiles has. The older he gets, the more messed up the whole thing feels. 

And, of course, she killed his family. He has trouble remembering the alpha is also the murderer.

"Does it say they haven't presented?" the Sheriff asks. "People used to present earlier. Something about hormones, I think. Your mom did her thesis on it." 

"She did? Can I read it?" 

"Sure, son. Come on, I'll get her boxes down." The Sheriff gives Stiles a hand up and they disappear upstairs. 

Derek props his cheek on his hand and reads about UCLA.

"Happy as a pig in mud," the Sheriff says, coming back into the dining room. "I'll never understand that kid as long as I live." He puts his hand on Derek's shoulder. "You okay?" 

Derek nods. He's normal, whatever. 

"I'm worried he's going to present young. I'm a beta, his mom was omega; his mom said it was a concern. She was a psychologist. God, I wish she were here," he sighs. 

Derek's eyes are on his hands.

"It's part of why I hired you. I don't know any other omega males and he's going to need someone who knows what he's going through."

"I presented six months ago," Derek says. 

"I know what happened." The Sheriff squeezes his shoulder. 

"So you know I'm the opposite of a role model."

"Not a role model. Eyes," he says, pointing to his eyes and then to Derek's. "A confidential informant." 

"He's in love with an alpha named Lydia," Derek says. 

The Sheriff snorts. "Since the third grade, yeah. I'm not worried about her. I'm worried about what happens when the hormones kick in and she still won't give him the time of day. He's going out for lacrosse next year on a mixed-grade mixed-orientation team. I'm worried about the locker room. He has his friend Scott, but he's just a beta, and hell, I was a beta in the locker room, I know how that plays out."

"My sister wants me to go to college in the fall." 

"Well, that gives you all summer. I'm going to want you here looking after him and Scott as well, if that's okay. Scott's mom and I will up your pay for looking after both our little delinquents." 

"Sure," Derek said. He used to watch five cousins at the same time, two of them in diapers. He can handle two unpresented teenagers no problem. 

"What are you majoring in?" 

Derek blinks. He looks at the brochures. "I have no idea," he says.

*

Stiles has a whiteboard. "Where did you get a whiteboard?" Derek asks. 

"I borrowed it," Stiles says. "Anyway, you have to figure out your interests, and then what pays money, and see what you want to do for the rest of your life." He uncaps a dry-erase marker with his teeth.

Laura opens the front door without even knocking and comes in with a bowl of popcorn. Orlando and Keira follow with sodas and bags of beef jerky. Derek glares at them. "We saw the whiteboard through the window," Laura says, really meaning that she was spying on them from down the street. "We want in." 

"You don't even know what we're doing," Derek growls. 

Stiles spits out the marker cap. "I'm consulting with Derek to ascertain the optimal focus of his university studies," he says. Keira squeaks, stifling a giggle, and bounces onto the sofa beside Derek. Laura and Orlando grin and sit on the loveseat next to the sofa. "What are you good at?" 

"Working out," Orlando says.

"Sarcasm," Laura says. 

"Okay, go home," Derek says. 

Keira shoulders him and gives him some beef jerky. "Math," she says. "Derek is good with numbers." 

"That's good! Very useful!" Stiles writes "MATH!" on the board. "You can be an accountant!" 

"Awesome," Derek says, rolling his eyes. 

"Mom worked for the IRS sniffing out tax evaders," Laura says. "Family business." 

Which actually is appealing. He remembers how happy her job made his mother. Keira is right, he is good with numbers. He's handled the pack budget since he was sixteen. "What do you study to be an IRS agent?" Derek asks. 

"Oh! I can find out! I need my computer!" Stiles says. He runs upstairs. 

"I get tired just looking at him," Laura says. "I kind of want to turn him."

"Really?" He...likes that idea, Stiles as his little brother, running under the moon with them. 

"But not until he presents. He can't decide until he's an adult." 

"I have it!" Stiles shouts upstairs. He runs pelting out of his room and down the stairs, laptop clutched in his good hand. "You just need to--whoa!" He slips halfway down the stairs and skids down three steps on the soles of his sneakers. 

Derek vaults over the back of the couch and catches him. "You dumbass," he says. "Do you want both arms in casts?" 

"No, no, that would be terrible. Thank you. For catching me. Wow." 

"Your dad is right you need a babysitter." 

"Noooo, I'm turning fourteen in a week!" 

"He already hired me for the summer to sit on you and Scott." 

"Oh man!" Stiles slinks over to the whiteboard, then straightens up. "Wait, so you're hanging out with me and Scott all summer? Every day?" 

"Yeah," Derek says.

"Oh my god, that's going to be be so cool!" Stiles grins. 

"All in the framing," Orlando says. Laura is beaming from ear to ear. 

*

He ends up getting into Berkeley. It has a top accounting program and it's not too far away. He doesn't want to be far from his pack. 

Scott and Stiles are the same age, but Scott seems younger. Derek thinks the Sheriff might be right about Stiles presenting early. "Okay, just try to catch the ball with the crosse!" Scott says. 

They're on the high school lacrosse field. Derek didn't realize until he reached New York that most high schools do not, in fact, have lacrosse fields, and most people haven't even heard of it. He wonders if Coach Finstock is a siren or something, bewitching the school. It would explain a lot. 

"I can catch a ball," Derek says. "If you both get one by me I'll buy you ice cream." 

"You are so on!" Stiles yells. 

Scott nets two balls. Stiles...Derek stumbles on purpose and lets one slip over his arm. The boys whoop and dogpile him while he's still on the grass. 

Okay, fine, it's kind of awesome. Derek grins at the sky. "Come on, puppies, let's get ice cream." 

Scott wants chocolate-chocolate chunk. Derek gets pistachio. They're both halfway through their cones before Stiles settles on sherbet with Pop Rocks mixed in. "Are you sure? That's not actually ice cream," Derek asks. 

"I have never been surer of anything!" Stiles says. 

"Okay, but it's on you," Derek says. 

The Pop Rocks make Stiles sneeze and giggle in turn, which makes Scott laugh at him. They remind him so much of his cousins...but it doesn't hurt, it's just kind of nice. He looks out at the window.

An alpha father with his daughter stops short and looks back at him. He nudges his daughter and they go inside the shop. Scott looks over his shoulder. "Oh my gosh, look at her!" he whispers to Stiles. Stiles sneezes in response. 

The father tells his daughter to get some ice cream and walks over to Derek. Scott scrambles up and goes over to the girl, ignoring the man completely. 

The man looks familiar. Shit is clearly going down. "Stiles, go see what Scott is doing," Derek says. Stiles looks at him funny but gets up as the man stops beside Derek. 

"Derek Hale, unless I'm mistaken," the man says. "I know your sister. Have her give me a call." He gives Derek a card: Chris Argent, Argent Arms. 

Kate's brother. 

"That's the sheriff's son. He's not going to take kindly to people threatening his kid's babysitter," Derek says. 

"Just a chat," Argent says. He turns away. "Allison, what looks good?" 

Allison is trying a taster spoon of chocolate-chocolate chunk while Scott gazes at her with stars in his eyes. She's an alpha, but not yet presented. Stiles sneezes on her; he looks horrified, but she just covers her mouth and laughs. Stiles slinks back to the booth. 

"Scott is totally in love and I sneezed on her," Stiles says. 

"Get another flavor," Derek says, getting his wallet from his pocket. 

"No! It's great, I love it, I just need to...practice...eating. Okay, fine, thanks." Stiles trades him his cone for a five. 

Derek crunches through Stiles's cone and watches the Argents. Chris has a pistol concealed in a shoulder holster. His daughter is probably unarmed, though. Her little purse isn't heavy enough to hide anything but a small knife. She's not looking at him, either, and a hunter would never take her eyes off a werewolf for long. Chris is watching him in the chrome over the counter. 

Kate always watched him in school. He'd thought it was romantic. He was such a freaking idiot. 

Stiles comes back with a butter rum cone in one hand and the front of Scott's hoodie in the other. Scott is beaming vacantly. "Allison broke him," Stiles says. 

It isn't a problem, he reminds himself. Scott is a beta. They're both unpresented. They won't even want to have sex for a year or two; this is puppy love, just like Stiles's crush on Lydia. 

He's obviously telling Scott's mom the minute they get home, though. "Come on, let's go," he says. 

"Allison," Scott says, his head lolling to one side. 

*

The subs know who the Argents are. "What are you going to do?" Keira asks. 

"Call him," Laura says. She leans back and flicks the card between her fingers. 

"He wasn't expecting to run into me," Derek says. "He wouldn't have brought his daughter. She doesn't know." 

"That's weird. She's unpresented, but she should be in training," Laura says. 

"Maybe she's not in the family business?" Orlando asks. 

"Argents have been in the family business since the middle ages," Laura says. 

"They don't have scruples," Derek says. "They say they have a code, but we know how far that goes."

Orlando rubs Laura's thigh. "Those slimeballs aren't getting the Hales again." 

"They come from the direction you least expect," Derek says. "Kate Argent..." 

The subs don't know this part. Laura looks at him with sympathy. He doesn't have to tell.

But they're pack. They're his family. "Kate Argent was my alpha for a month before the fire. She was a substitute teacher at the high school. She took advantage of the access." 

Keira mouths the air a few times. "But you only presented last year--oh my god." She jumps up and hugs him. Derek hugs back weakly. 

Family, they're his family now. "I had to get an abortion. It's the link that--they thought it was her motive. They thought she wanted to run away with me. But I think she wanted me to die," he whispers. 

Orlando hugs him from behind. He's tall. He feels like Derek's dad, the way he would just pick Derek up and squeeze him. "I love you, baby bro," he says. 

"They're not getting us again," Laura says. She leans over Keira and kisses Derek on the forehead. 

*

Later that night, she comes in and sits on his bed. He sits up and rests his forehead against her back. "Would you have told me if you weren't pregnant?" Laura asks. 

"Never," Derek says. 

"Then I'm glad she knocked you up. She's in jail for life and we're still here. We're pack. I love you, dummy, no matter what." 

He wraps his arms around her middle. She puts her hands over his. 

"Try and find someone at Berkeley, okay? A beta. A male beta would be good for you. You don't have to have an alpha just because you're an omega, that's some 1950s bullshit. You're still a virgin," she says. His hands clench unconsciously and she digs her claws in. "That shit she did doesn't count. You've never had real sex. Listen!" He's shaking his head, but she turns and takes his chin. "Rape doesn't count, baby brother. It doesn't. Nothing counts until you want it, until you're old enough and everything is mutual. I'm saying this as your sister and your pack leader and as someone who knows, so believe me!" 

He's shaking all over. He bares his teeth at her and she shows fangs and eyes right back. 

But she lets them fade. "Orlando and I have been trying for a baby," she says. 

He takes a deep breath. "Who's carrying?"

"Either of us. We do it either way." She smiles. "Sometimes at the same time."

"Ugh!" 

"It's fun. You just lie in different directions--I'm serious about finding yourself a beta. You've got me bossing you around, you don't need another alpha in your life. I love you. I want you to be happy."

He sighs. "Yeah, I love you too." 

"Make some Hale babies. You're more fertile than me. I want at least five." 

"Five?!" 

"Yeah, so you better get started!" 

"I'm not having five kids!" Derek shouts. 

"Beacon Hills is not Beacon Hills without a dozen Hales in town."

Derek growls and pulls his sheets over his head. Laura doesn't leave, though; she lies down beside him and holds him through the covers.

They sleep that way, together. 

*

Laura sends Keira to work with Derek. "They can't attack you at the Sheriff's house. It would be declaring war on human law. So this way, even if it's an ambush, we still have half the pack safe."

Keira helps him apartment-hunt while the boys play video games. They're setting up a bunch of viewings for one weekend so he can drive down and do it all at once. There was never a question of him staying in the dorms. Too much noise and smell and...people. 

He tries not to think about the Argents.

A text comes in on his phone and he grabs it, Keira crowding in at his side. It's from Laura. "Argents OK. Not hunting just watching. Peace."

It doesn't really make him feel better. 

"YES! EAT HOT MAGIC!" Stiles yells. He victory couch-dances so hard he falls ass-first onto the floor.

*

They run next full moon, the four of them. Pack and family and pack and it's so good. Laura runs circles around them in her alpha form, black-furred and giant, landing bites on Orlando's butt and bowling Keira and Derek over into the bushes. Keira growls and tackles Laura back. Laura pins her to the ground until Keira licks her chin in submission. 

Orlando tags Derek and they play box. Orlando gets him into a headlock; he's bigger, older, it feels safe. He nips Orlando on the side and Orlando hauls him up by his middle, baring his belly to the sky. 

This is why it's so crushing to come out of the forest and find Chris Argent and two minions by their cars. Laura stands up and shifts back, wearing nudity like a crown. "Evening," she says. 

"Morning," Argent says, glancing at his wristwatch. "How's the pack?" 

"Ducky," Laura says. 

Argent looks at Derek. "I'm sorry for the actions of my sister," he says. "I wanted to say that to both of you. I follow the Code and so do all those who stand with me." 

Derek is silent. Laura asks, "So why are you here?" 

"Well, I didn't have the chance to see your full pack. Ms Hale, Mr Hale, Ms Holland, and Mr Washington. These are my colleagues, Mr Thomas and Mr Rhodes. My mate Victoria is home with our daughter Allison. This is our entire contingent in Beacon Hills. I'm glad to see we were honest with each other. I hope we'll continue." 

"I don't hold the actions of your sister against you as long as you never, ever, defend them to me," Laura says. "If, as you say, you hunt those who hunt humans, we won't have a problem. Just keep in mind that I trust you about as far as I can piss." Her voice lowers to a growl as she finishes. 

Argent nods. Laura gets into the passenger side of the Camaro and Orlando follows, taking the driver's seat. Laura doesn't take her eyes off Argent as Derek and Keira climb into Keira's Civic. 

They pull out. The Argents don't follow. Derek texts Laura: "Please put clothes on before we reach town." 

She replies: "I'M FREE! FREE-BALLIN!"

*

"So..." Scott says. "Can we go to the mall? Please?" 

"Why?" Derek asks. 

"Because Allison posted on Facebook that she and Lydia are going to the mall today because they're BFFs and Scott is a stalker," Stiles says. 

Scott punches his arm. "I just want to say hi! And maybe get a pretzel!" 

"Eating things in her direction is not going to make her fall in love with you!" 

"It might!" 

"Yes, we can go," Derek says. "I need to get stuff for college. You guys can help carry. And _if_ we run into Allison and Lydia, you guys can say hi, but no stalking. Got it?"

"I am not a stalker! Scott is the stalker!" Stiles says. 

"I'm not a stalker!" 

Derek rolls his eyes. "Boys! I need a bookshelf, a desk, and a lamp. I don't need any high school drama."

"I am one hundred percent drama free!" Stiles protests. Derek just looks at him. 

He takes the Jeep--Stiles's Jeep, he says, even though he won't be able to drive it for another two years, but his mother left it to him in her will--and pulls into the side by the JC Penney. 

"No, nobody shops at JC Penney!" Scott says. 

"I'm shopping at JC Penney. If you don't like it, we can go home." 

"Fiiiine," Scott groans. 

He drag them in. Stiles grabs a cart without being told. "What's your budget?" Stiles asks. "Because wood is way better than particle board, but it costs more." 

"I'm going for an accounting degree. I can handle the budget. But yeah, I want wood." 

"I like JC Penney," Stiles says. "They support same-orientation relationships. I support equality." 

Derek glances at him. "Good." 

"Because, I mean, everyone is just a person, right? So I don't see what the difference is between dating a female beta, right, or a male omega, right, that's kind of the same, right? Right?" 

"Speaking as a male omega, wrong." 

"You're an omega?" Stiles stops and blinks at him. 

"Dude, really? We thought you were a beta," Scott says. 

"You can't smell it?" Derek asks. 

"No, mom says we can't tell for sure until after we present," Scott says. 

"Huh. I could always tell," Derek says. "I'm an omega and my cousin Keira is a female beta. It's different. Trust me."

"What is presenting like?" Stiles asks. 

"Yeah, Mom just says we'll know when it happens but doesn't say how!" Scott says. 

Derek leans in. "I am not discussing this with you in the middle of the store!" he hisses. "Go online or something!" 

"Googling heat just gets porn and Wikipedia!" Stiles says. 

"Not here! Not now! Not ever."

"But you don't want us to learn from porn, do you?" Stiles says. 

"Do you?" Scott echoes. 

"Jesus," Derek groans. "Not here! I'm trying to buy a desk." He takes the cart from Stiles. 

"But later, right?" Stiles asks. 

He really, really wants to show teeth. 

Instead, he buys a wood desk and a particle board bookcase and a black metal torchiere lamp with shelves built into the base. He has one box of books already and he hasn't even started buying textbooks. 

The boys help him load up the Jeep, so he takes them back into the food court for bad Chinese. (He knows it's bad tasting and bad for him, but sometimes he just really wants chicken wads in sticky red goop. He just won't tell his sister. Or the boys' parents.)

Inevitably, they run into Allison and Lydia at the food court, and that's when Derek finds out Lydia is not only beautiful, strawberry blonde, and alpha, but she's presented. The smell of her sets his teeth on edge. 

He has to get over this. He can't be this way for the rest of his life. A quarter of the population is alpha and nearly half of those are female. He can't be some weird bigot forever. 

His sister is alpha. He just needs to treat her like his sister. 

Fortunately, the girls are at a four-top, so the boys slide in next to them and Derek sits at the next table over. Allison looks at him curiously. "Stiles, is he your brother?" she asks. 

"Brother? No? Oh, Derek? He's my--um." Stiles looks at him in a panic. Derek looks back, wondering what he'll come up with. "Cousin."

"Really? I didn't know he was your cousin," Scott says. Stiles glares at him.

"I'm their babysitter," Derek says. Both boys shout wordlessly. 

Stiles recovers first. "Uncool!" 

"He's not my babysitter! He's Stiles's babysitter!" Scott says. 

"Sheriff Stilinski and Mrs McCall hired me to look after them this summer and keep them from skateboarding off any more roofs." He's grinning ear to ear. The boys look ready to commit suicide. 

"That's sweet," Lydia says, poison dripping from her tongue. 

"It is sweet," Allison says. "It means you can go places and do stuff. My mom had to drive us to the mall and we're stuck here until she picks us up." Scott turns to her and smiles dopily. 

"Wow, omigod, you are so right, this is the best," Stiles says. 

"Mm-hm. I know kids our age who _are_ babysitters," Lydia says.

"He's our chauffeur. This is amazing," Stiles says. 

Derek eats his sweet and sour chicken. Allison starts talking about the clothes they bought, which Stiles guides Scott through admiring. 

They talk, and keep talking and not eating, and finally Derek feels weird paying attention and pulls a book out of his jacket pocket. He keeps his ears open. As long as the boys are talking, it's fine. He doesn't look up until a female omega sits next to him.

"Interesting choice," she says. Short red hair. Over-plucked eyebrows. Expensive perfume, the kind that doesn't give him a headache but doesn't smell sexy either. She smells powerful. 

"I like Princesses Rhyme and Reason," Derek says. He dog-ears the page and sets _The Phantom Tollbooth_ on the table in front of him. "You're Allison's mother?" 

"You can call me Victoria," she says. 

Everything about her screams _hunter_. She's as clearly a part of the Argent work as Allison is not. "Derek Hale," he says. He offers his hand and Victoria shakes it. 

"So you're looking after the boys over the summer?"

Derek nods. "Practice for kids of my own. We lost ten in the fire, you know," he says softly. 

"Which is deplorable," she replies without feeling. He believes it much more from Chris Argent. 

"Derek!" Scott shouts. "Can we go to Allison's? She's got Call of Duty Black Ops!"

"I need to run it by your mom first," Derek says. 

"But Derek, Call of Duty!" 

"I like first person shooters," Allison says. 

"It's all right by me," Victoria says. 

Derek shakes his head and texts Mrs McCall and the Sheriff. 

*

"I'll be back in two hours," Derek says. Scott isn't listening, he's already squaring off against Allison, Stiles sitting on the arm of the couch beside him. Derek rolls his eyes and tells Victoria, "I'll be back in two hours."

"I suppose you wouldn't feel comfortable in our house," she says. 

"Not in the least." 

"I understand. I'll take good care of the boys."

"I know you will. They're human," Derek says, and leaves. 

He drives. Eventually, he realizes he's driving out to the old house. He hasn't been since they moved back. Even thinking of it brings back the smell of smoke and death. 

He remembers when he'd never even heard of the Argents. He remembers being a child, a long time ago. He remembers his mother stroking his hair. He felt like she was immortal, as big as a giant and as strong as a mountain. His mother was alpha and dominant and queen. Laura is just her shadow. 

He's surprised to find the third story still partially standing. The fire was worst in the rear, which has fallen away entirely. He remembers the wind gusting the fire back from the front of the house like a giant trying to blow out a candle. He imagines it was his mother's dying breath.

Derek knows better than to doubt his mother. He leans against the Jeep and listens for her voice. 

"Derek." 

He opens his eyes to Laura. 

"You shouldn't be here," she says. "It's not good for you." 

"I'm responsible. I should see what I did." 

"What _she_ did," Laura says. "It was never because of you."

"It wouldn't have happened without my help. She got my keys."

"Okay, and if she hadn't, she would have gotten a freaking rocket launcher because she was a psycho and an arms dealer. Quit it, Derek! I need you--" She gestures at her head. "Here! Mentally. Not then!" 

He looks at her.

"One step forward, two steps back with you." She sighs. "Where are the kids?" 

"Playing Call of Duty with Allison Argent." 

"Oh. Okay, this makes more sense now." Laura leans on the car beside him. "But you're still a drama llama."

"Shut up."

"Come on, let's get out of here. It's going to be demolished next week. Mom would never be okay with this hanging around like an open wound." 

"But the wound is still there," Derek says. 

"Yeah, but healing metaphor and stuff. Come on, we'll take your things back to the house and then you can rescue the kids from the evil witch." 

Derek gets in the car. "Allison Argent might be the nicest girl I've ever met, actually," he says. 

"Her mom is the evil freaking witch," Laura says. "I think I saw her eat a whole mouse like the aliens in V." 

Derek snickers. Laura drives them back into town. 

*

Laura drives down with him to see the apartments. Fair is fair. She's paying for it. 

They see four. "Do you prefer mice or roaches?" she asks. 

"Mice," Derek says. He licks his teeth at her and she snorts. 

"Mice it is, then. Is this really all they had?" 

"Everything under fifteen hundred bucks a month." 

"Ugh. Fucking San Francisco." But she gestures and he gets on the phone with the landlord of the mouse-infested apartment. 

"Why didn't you go for Keira?" Laura asks on the way back. "I really thought you would go for her." 

Derek shrugs. 

"She's nice." 

"She is nice." 

"She likes you." 

Derek folds his knee up. "Lots of people like the way I look." 

Laura glances at him. "Oh." 

He's gotten looks since Kate. He smelled ambiguous after the abortion, before presenting, not fully adult but not quite a child. It appealed to a certain kind of person. He was asked once a week if he was going into heat, people leaning into his personal space, sweaty and twitching for his scent. 

He never told Laura. He could handle it--he _can_ handle it. He's an attractive omega. It's a fact. He knows a million ways to rebuff people. He's also a freaking werewolf and can show even the biggest, meanest alpha her spleen. 

"Is there anyone you're interested in?" Laura asks. 

"Not that I've met." He looks at her. "I don't need an alpha to be fulfilled." 

"Please, I know." 

"I'm a liberated omega. I have a career, Mom, I have my own house! I'm happy being me and standing on my own two feet!" He's quoting an old movie that used to play every two weeks on the local channels. 

"I will give you a hundred dollars if you wear those paisley pants. One hundred dollars in two dollar bills." 

"Maybe," Derek says. He brings his other knee up and slouches against the dashboard. 

"You should go into heat soon, right? It's been six months." 

"Probably in a week or two. It won't be regular for a couple of years." 

"Oh, shit, you won't be in heat during finals, will you?" She winces. 

"I'll get straight As if I am." 

She reaches over and socks him in the shoulder. 

"I have everything I need for heat," he says. "We even have a giant box of pads under the sink. Do you even use those?" 

"No. Alphas are eco-friendly and recycle our womb lining." 

He's jealous. He hates the menstruation that comes two weeks after heat. Male and female betas menstruate as well, but it doesn't seem as...gory...as what he goes through. "I'll be fine," he says. 

*

He visits Uncle Peter on the weekend, his day off. "Does it make any difference when we visit him?" he asks the nurse. 

"Not really," she says. 

He stays anyway. He reads the last chapter of _The Phantom Tollbooth_ aloud. Uncle Peter doesn't even flicker. 

*

"I need to take next week off due to cycling," Derek tells the Sheriff. 

The Sheriff just looks confused. "Cycling? You mean like--oh! Jesus, it's been too long since I had a grown omega in the house." He rubs his hand over his face. "Okay. We'll just--lock the boys in the basement or something, I don't know. Do you mean starting from Monday?" 

"I'm not sure exactly."

 

"Really? My wife had it timed down to the hour."

"It takes up to five years for heat to be predictable," Derek says. It took five gynecologists before he finally found one that told him that. All the ones before that wanted to put him on hormone therapy to bring on presentation. That wouldn't work on a werewolf, obviously, so he traded doctors until he found one that just... _explained_ how his plumbing works. 

"They don't tell you these things when you take home a little omega baby," the Sheriff says. 

"They don't tell you these things when you _are_ an omega baby." 

"Should I get him a gynecologist? Should I wait until he presents?" 

"Do it now. He's old enough." 

"My baby's growing up," the Sheriff says. "I'm not ready." 

Better than the alternative, Derek thinks.

*

He makes the mistake of taking the boys to a movie. Two twenty-something alphas in the ticket line ahead of them turn and look at them; Derek stares back stonily. But they hang back and follow him to the concessions line. 

"Hey," one says, and Derek turns, thinking he's talking to him, but the alpha is _touching Stiles's head_. "You'd be cute if you let your hair grow." Stiles is frozen in shock. 

Derek snarls and grabs the front of the alpha's shirt. "He's fourteen, you sick fuck!" He shoves the alpha away. 

The other alpha leans in and takes a loud sniff. "Well maybe you shouldn't touch him so much, slut!" 

Derek has both fists clenched and he is going to break that fucker's FACE IN but then there are hands on both elbows and Stiles yelling "whoa, whoa, whoa!" in his ear. He's panting, ready to RIP OFF HIS HEAD AND SHIT IN HIS EYE SOCKETS but the kids are sitting on his chest and, and, and he won't risk hurting the boys. 

He blinks. He's on the floor with both boys sitting on his chest and looking down at him. "Dude," Scott says. "I've never even heard you raise your voice before." 

He catches his breath. The boys let him up. "Um," he says. His face is hot. 

There's a beta in a theater uniform in front of him. "They're banned, sir," the beta says. "Are you okay?" 

"Yeah. Stiles, Scott, are you okay?" 

"Yeah," they both say. 

"We're leaving," Derek says. The beta nods. 

"Wait, what about the movie?" Stiles says. 

"Forget it. Come on." He takes both boys by the shoulder and walks them out.

"But that guy was hitting on me, that's illegal, and you were just defending me. We need to call my dad," Stiles says. 

"No," Derek says quietly. "We need to leave. I'll explain in the car." 

He sits for a moment with his head against the steering wheel. He can feel the weight of Stiles's eyes on him. Finally, he looks up. 

"Why can't I call my dad?" Stiles asks. He sounds small. 

"I'm going into heat. I thought it was next week, but it's this week, probably tomorrow. And it's a defense," Derek says. "They can point to that and say it's not their fault they were acting like creeps, there was an omega starting heat around, so they were just reacting. Maybe--" He shakes his head. "Maybe if they'd been hitting on me and I'd just stood there and cried, they'd get arrested. But all they said was a factual statement. You would be cute if you had long hair. And then I got irrational and attacked him. I'd get arrested for assault." 

"But--my dad," Stiles says. His eyes are huge. 

"Your dad wouldn't arrest me. But a lot of cops would." 

"But that's not fair," Scott says from the back seat. 

"It's how things are. Omegas have to deal with a lot of shit that betas and alphas don't." Derek starts the car. 

The drive home is utterly silent until Stiles says, "I'm glad you didn't just stand there and cry." 

"I'm not that kind of omega," Derek says. 

Stiles texts his dad in the car and the Sheriff meets them at home. Stiles walks straight into his arms and hugs him. "What the heck happened?" the Sheriff asks. 

"I'm sorry," Derek says. 

*

Heat is miserable. He's hungry but can't stand putting food in his mouth. He wants to jerk off, but is embarrassed about his pack hearing him. He finally grits his teeth, shoves a plug up his butt, and rubs off against the mattress with his pillow over his head to muffle his breathing. 

It doesn't matter that he can hear his sister and Orlando fucking three nights a week. That's _them_. 

He comes out of his room two days later, starving, cranky, with epic bedhead. Laura pets his hair and he growls at her through his toast. 

"Poor o-bro," Laura says.

"Kill you with my fork," Derek mutters, and stuffs a sausage in his mouth. 

"I'm so sympathetic I'm not even going to mock you for sucking down that sausage in one bite." 

*

Scott and Stiles are reading a book on anatomy when he arrives. "Godspeed," the Sheriff says as he leaves. 

"So, if you don't have sex during heat, do you feel like you're going to die?" Stiles asks. 

 

"No," Derek says. 

"Does it last longer if you don't have an alpha?" Scott asks. 

"No." 

"But is it different if you have an alpha?" Stiles asks. 

Derek rolls his eyes at the ceiling. "I wouldn't know," he says. 

"You've never had an alpha during heat?" Stiles asks. He's leaning forward in his seat. 

"I don't want to talk about this with a couple of kids!" 

"Nobody ever wants to talk about it!" Scott wails. 

"Come on, Scott, I found a website," Stiles says. He makes a show of slowly closing the book and standing up. 

Derek glares at him. Stiles glares back. 

"Fine," Derek says. "Heat means your body throws everything out the window and makes you want to have sex. I couldn't eat for two days and was hard the whole time. I had to whack off to be able to _pee_. But it didn't make me crazy, and it didn't make me helpless, and it didn't make me want to jump out the window and hump the mailman, okay? It just sucks. It pisses me off that I can't avoid it because the pill doesn't work for me. It pisses me off that it's never going to happen to you, Scott, because you're a beta. And it pisses me off that it's going to happen to Stiles because he's an omega." Derek sighs. "It just pisses me off. Okay? And it's going to be worse in two weeks when I'm on the rag because I didn't get pregnant." 

"Crap," Scott says. 

Stiles's eyes are round as dollar coins. "Wow. Scott doesn't even have his period yet." 

"Dude, shut up!" 

"It starts earlier for omegas but it's more irregular for betas. My sister's mate has his period once a month. He keeps wrecking his underwear and stealing mine," Derek says. 

"No way! Is that going to happen to me?" 

Derek shrugs. "Maybe."

"Dude!" Scott wails. 

*

Two weeks later, Derek is bleeding and deeply uncomfortable. He takes his current book ( _Alice in Wonderland_ \--yes, dammit, he likes kid's books; he's faced enough shit in his life not to want any more shit in his entertainment) to read to his uncle. 

Twenty pages in, Uncle Peter turns his head and looks at him. Derek drops his book. 

He hits the call button. "My uncle moved," he tells the nurse. 

"He does that," she says. "He's in a persistent vegetative state, didn't they explain?" 

"No?" He thought his uncle was just...asleep. 

She pulls up a chair. "My name is Jennifer. You're Derek, right? Your uncle suffered brain damage that left him unable to reach full awareness. But he's not fully unconscious, either. It's like he's dreaming, and sometimes he's a little closer to awakeness than other times. So--he moves, and he looks at things, and sometimes he even talks, but it's like he's sleepwalking. He swallows when I put food in his mouth. We don't have to tube feed him. But he's not really there, and he probably isn't ever going to be. Not after four years." 

Derek nods. It seems like his uncle is looking at him, it really does. 

"But go on and read to him. Maybe it will give him nice dreams. I'm going to put him in his chair now, if you want to take him outside." 

"Yeah," Derek says. 

He sits at his uncle's feet in the garden and reads to him. 

It would be nice if it weren't his fault. 

*

Honestly, the summer is pretty great. Beacon Hills feels like home. He still remembers tearing around the town as a kid, learning every corner, playing tag with his sisters and cousins in the industrial district, learning to do flips off the walls. The boys are a lot of fun, even when they're annoying as shit. And for the first time in a long time, he's looking forward to the future. 

He rubs Stiles's bristly head before he leaves. "You can call me. And email me," he says. 

"Are you kidding? I am texting and emailing every _day_. I need _serious omega advice_ ," Stiles says. 

He even hugs Scott. Well, more of a side hug. Scott is trying to act like an adult and thinks hugs are for kids. Derek is leaving it to his mom to tell him how wrong he is. 

Then he leaves.

*

From: Stiles  
To: Derek Hale  
Subject: college omega! 

Told you I would email every day! You aren't even there yet and I'm emailing!

Truth: Are you looking to get your M.R.S.? 

From: Derek Hale  
To: Stiles  
Subject: Re: college omega! 

I'm trying to get a degree and that's it. 

From: Stiles  
To: Derek Hale  
Subject: Re: college omega! 

But what if you meet some hot alpha? 

From: Derek Hale  
To: Stiles  
Subject: Re: college omega! 

I've met hot alphas before. They were dicks. 

Drop it or I tell Scott your real first name. Yes, your dad told me. 

From: Stiles  
To: Derek Hale  
Subject: Re: college omega! 

:X

*

College is easy. People are hard. 

*

From: Stiles  
To: Derek Hale  
Subject: :P

Jackson just presented. It's really funny how much he hates being a beta. Bet he loves being boned by Lydia though. 

From: Derek Hale  
To: Stiles  
Subject: o-brother

You are never going to get with Lydia. She's not interested. 

From: Stiles  
To: Derek Hale  
Subject: Re: o-brother

Aw, you never call me o-bro, big o! 

Just wait until I present. 

*

College is really easy. But after testifying in a murder trial at age sixteen, nothing short of a tactical nuke is really going to throw him. 

*

From: Stiles  
To: Derek Hale  
Subject: ugh ugh ugh

Jackson was bragging up how good sleeping with Lydia was. I said if she's such an athlete why isn't she on the lacrosse team? Which totally shut him up but then he tackled the shit out of me all practice.

SO WORTH IT

From: Derek Hale  
To: Stiles  
Subject: Re: ugh ugh ugh

It's okay to wait to have sex. You're technically an adult after you present but it's easy to get into a bad relationship when you're young. It's good to wait and get used to your body and figure out what you want first.

From: Stiles  
To: Derek Hale  
Subject: sit on my couch

DUDE YOU NEVER TELL ME YOUR DATING HISTORY YOU DICKKKKKK

spill!

From: Derek Hale  
To: Stiles  
Subject: Re: sit on my couch

There's a reason I don't tell you my dating history. 

Maybe I know what the fuck I'm talking about? 

*

People are really fucking hard. 

He's flabbergasted when his European History study partner kisses him.

*

From: Derek Hale  
To: Laura Hale  
Subject: 

am I normal?

_Missed call from Laura Hale_

_Missed call from Laura Hale_

_Missed call from Laura Hale_

From: Laura Hale  
To: Derek Hale  
Subject: don't freak me out like this!

Turn your ringer back on!

*

He calls Nia back the next day. "Sorry," he says. 

"No, I am so sorry, I read that all wrong." 

Derek swallows. "Do you want to come over and watch a movie Friday?" 

"Yes!" she shouts. 

They watch the first half of the movie. They miss the rest making out. 

*

From: Stiles  
To: Derek  
Subject: BETA GODDESS

HAVE YOU DINE THE NASTY YET? I need to know everything! 

From Derek  
To Stiles  
Subject: Re: BETA GODDESS

I'm not giving you any details, kid. 

From: Derek Hale  
To: Laura Hale  
Subject: okay

How many dates with a beta female before we have to have sex? 

From: Laura Hale  
To: Derek Hale  
Subject: bow chika bow bow

Whenever you start to feel it. First date isn't too soon. And you don't have to if you don't actively want her between your legs. 

From: Derek Hale  
To: Laura Hale  
Subject: no

I want it but I don't want to do it wrong. 

From: Laura Hale  
To: Derek Hale  
Subject: yes

Just tell her you're a virgin. Everyone is some time. If you can't tell her that, she's not the right person. 

*

He can't get the words out, so he just shows her the email. 

Nia looks up. "Is this your sister?" 

Derek nods. "She's older and alpha." 

"You are the cutest," Nia says. She grins. "I will totally show you what to do." 

*

Beta female anatomy isn't all that different from omega male anatomy. Her clit is about the same size as his cock. 

"So--do you have condoms? I forgot," Derek says. he's trying to be mature and adult but holy shit her hand is on his cock and inside his ass and he's having trouble not just closing his eyes and coming all over her naked, gorgeous breasts. 

"Why, you want inside me?" 

"Nnnnno," Derek gasps. "You don't?"

"I'm good." She leans over and bites his belly just below his navel and Derek comes so hard he whites out. 

When he catches his breath, Nia is stretched out beside him playing with his nipple, rolling it between her thumb and forefinger and then pushing down into the slight soft layer of breast tissue underneath. That's how he'd found out he was pregnant, the mammary layer swelling into actual breasts. 

He doesn't want to think about being pregnant. He rolls into Nia and inhales the delicious sweaty smell of her hair. "You're not a virgin any more," she sings. "I just thought you should know."

"Thank you."

She smiles. "Want to learn how to suck cock? Because I'm still--okay then," she says as he scrambles down the bed. 

*

From Derek  
To Laura  
Subject: so

Did it. It was cool. 

From Laura  
To Derek  
Subject: today you are a man

I bet you're glowing. Maybe even smiling. 

*

Derek gets straight As his first semester and comes home for winter break. Orlando picks him up.

As soon as Derek gets out of the car, he kisses Laura's cheek. Its affection, it's submission, but it also lets him breathe her in. He's missed the pack horribly. He's never been apart from them even a fraction as long. 

And his sister smells weird. He frowns and sniffs her again. "What?" she asks. 

"Get a pregnancy test," he says. 

"No way!"

"Unless you turned into an omega yesterday." He grins. 

The pack is safe. The pack is growing. This is very, very good. 

*

Workers break ground on the new house. 

It's going to be different from the old house. Laura takes him out to the site. "Building it log cabin style means we'll have natural insulation and need less energy. I'm thinking about putting a windmill, since we're at the top of the hill, but I don't know if the noise would drive us crazy." 

"Probably," Derek says. 

"Yeah. Crap. Well, we're going to have an on demand water heater so we never run out of hot, a generator in a reinforced shed, and a fireplace in the middle of the house for warmth. Big windows, lots of light." 

Thick walls for protection. Big windows so they can use their senses. Generator in case they come under attack. 

"And a dugout basement and root cellar. If Uncle Peter wakes up, he can rebuild his wine collection," Laura says. 

Hideout. Escape route. She doesn't need to say it; Derek knows it. He knows he will be helping her customize their house when the workers are done. "It's great," Derek says. 

"Should take about six months to build, so it will be done before the baby comes." She beams. 

Derek kisses her cheek. She pulls him down and kisses his forehead. The pack is strong. 

*

Nia comes down after New Year's to meet the pack and bring Derek back to school. When she arrives, unfortunately, Scott and Stiles are hunting Derek with Super Soakers. 

"You'll regret it as long as you live, and that won't be long," Derek says. They've cornered him against the front door. His damn sister locked it. He can't escape without werewolf powers. 

"Maybe," Stiles says. He's actually chewing a toothpick. 

"You can't kill us. You're the babysitter," Scott says. 

"And I have poor impulse control," Stiles says. 

Derek snarls. Who bought these brats Super Soakers anyway? Those reservoirs have to hold a gallon. He's _lucky_ if they're just loaded with water. "I will show you the meaning of pain," he growls at the bottom of his range. 

 

Stiles cocks his gun. So does Scott. 

"I know things about you," Derek says. "Both of you." 

Stiles spits out the toothpick. "Bring it." 

A car horn blares behind them. Stiles jumps and turns toward the noise. He starts shooting, probably accidentally, and it's like a damn fire hose. Scott follows his lead, thoroughly covering the car in...Derek sniffs. Fruit punch. Those brats. 

Derek yanks the caps off both their reservoirs and dumps the remainder down both their pants simultaneously. The boys yelp. "Oh, gee, did you have a little accident? Remember a maxi pad next time," Derek says. He grabs their collars and marches them down to the street. "Get lost!" 

"You have won this battle but not the war!" Stiles vows. 

"Change your pants," Derek says. He shoves them both towards Stiles's house.

Nia gets out of the car. "What the hell?" 

"I used to babysit them." 

"Oh. Actually, that explains everything." 

"And the omega kid is probably presenting this year, so I gave him a vibrator for Christmas. He opened it in front of his dad." Derek grins. 

"Dude!" 

"His dad thought it was hilarious. He was just happy he didn't have to buy it himself. Hi," Derek says, and steps up close to Nia. She takes his shoulders and kisses him. 

*

They make a hot chocolate toast to the baby. "You're next," Laura tells Derek. 

"I'm getting my degree first. Three and a half years to go." 

"Three years, then you get pregnant during senior year and give birth right after graduation," Laura says. 

Derek rolls his eyes. "Keep thinking you have a say," he says. 

That night, Nia sits on the bed and says, "So you want kids?" 

"Yeah." 

"Because I don't," she says. 

Derek sits on the bed as well and looks at her. "Not at all?" 

"No." 

"I want three," Derek says. He's actually not sure that his sister's demand of five is all that crazy. 

"Yeah, we can't really negotiate children. Shit. This isn't going to work." 

They look at each other. 

"I...don't know how to do breakups," Derek says. "I like you. I don't want children tomorrow." 

"Yeah..." She sighs. 

They get in bed and look at each other until they fall asleep. 

*

"You're looking for something serious," Nia says over breakfast. "You just are." 

Derek has to nod. 

"So we're just not going to work. I mean, if you get pregnant accidentally, you're going to want to keep it, right? And I won't. So we shouldn't have sex." 

*

"I'd like...I still like you," Derek says in the car on the way back to Berkeley. 

"We can try being friends," Nia says. 

"Heat friends," Derek says. "My heat is overdue." 

"Damn. When I was in high school, I _dreamed_ of the day a beautiful omega would ask me to be heat friends. Deal." 

*

His third heat hits at the beginning of the school year. He calls Nia. 

He answers the door naked. Nia makes a strangled noise and tackles him into the futon. "Careful, not on the pill, going to get pregnant, fuck," Derek mutters into her mouth. He kisses her hard, tongue against tongue. 

"I got you, baby," she says, and she lifts his leg over her elbow and slides her fingers up into his vent. 

Derek tosses his head back and groans. It is different with a partner. And it's different not being in a house with his sister, but also he doesn't care how much noise he makes, because this is _good_. Nia's fingers are probing up into all the spots she knows so well. 

"You are soaking," she says. "I brought condoms, do you want to?" 

Derek nods. He wants to everything. 

"Okay. Okay, okay, you get to bed and I will get naked and we will make this happen. Oh, fuck, there's already a wet spot on the couch," she whines. She stands up clumsily. 

Derek stumbles to his feet and weaves over to the bed behind the partition. He pitches forward onto the bed. This is good. He's good. He stays on his hands and knees and looks upside down through his thighs at Nia. 

Nia is trying to take off her clothes while holding a condom in one hand. It's not working very well. Finally she comes over, tosses the condom next to Derek, and wrestles out of her shirt while shaking her jeans down her hips at the same time. It also doesn't work very well, so Derek speeds things up by opening the condom up and smoothing it in himself. 

"Argh! You're too hot, I can't brain. Help me!" Nia cries. Her shirt is twisted around her shoulders. Derek sighs, sits up, and gently tugs the shirt up and over. Nia flings herself onto the bed and pries off her shoes, which lets her jeans slide off as well. 

She looks at him. She growls. Derek pounces first. 

*

He can hear the baby in Laura's belly. He can even see it, almost smell it. She smiles and takes his hand. "It's just little right now," she says. "A pound and a half. It moves a lot. I wonder what it's thinking about." 

"You," Derek says. 

"It's definitely a wolf. It goes nuts on the full moon."

He listens to the speedy little heart of the baby. New pack. New family. "I should have had the baby," he murmurs. 

"No." 

He'd been two months along. It hadn't even been a baby, just a zygote, half an inch long, only one gram. But it could have been a baby. It could have been new pack like this kid. 

"Derek," Laura says. He doesn't look up. "I'm not going to apologize for putting you first. You weren't coping. You didn't even talk. You do not want that psycho's baby." 

"I'm not mad," he says. He isn't. He's just. Something. 

*

He stretches out on a rock looking over the river. The bottom line is he doesn't know what he wants, except of course for wanting his family not to be dead, which isn't an actionable desire. 

Kate is in prison and he's supposed to get some closure from that, but he can't even figure out what closure means. It's not like anything hurts less. He's moving on, whatever, but he still feels like the same stupid kid. 

If he'd had the baby, it would be four now. It would have learned to talk with a New York accent. It would have black hair and green eyes like himself, like Laura, like their mom and grandma and great-grandma. 

Or. Or it would have had Kate's eyes and he would have lost his shit and gone lone, leaving his sister with the kid. Laura is right. He wasn't in his right mind. What would they have even done, that first year, when she was working two jobs and he was sleepwalking through school? He'd found out later the kids at that school called him "The Zombie." He hadn't done any schoolwork, failed out of his classes, nearly got put into foster care. Laura had screamed at him, cried, shaken him out of his walking coma, and he'd pulled himself out of it enough to get his GED that fall and get a job. 

Then Laura met Orlando, and Keira, and Derek found out that working out cleared his head, and things started to get a lot better. 

And now...

Now?

He could have a future, a pack, a family. He just had to decide if he wanted it.

*

**Author's Note:**

> I intended for this story to be a lot longer; you can see the threads of plot if you squint. Canon kind of got away from me, though...


End file.
